Hello Peeps♥ Is me again and I just feel super busy recently but finally I have some extra time to blog about this post. It's all about my BIG BIG day!! Married?!! Noppppp~ Teehee it's one of the happiest day I had within this year. It's my convocation. I told myself I have to do whatever I can to make my parent to be proud of me.
I DID IT...I DID IT...
You know how I feel when I'm walking on the stage? Maybe it's very easy for you but for me I need to work extra hard than most of you. Finally I graduated with my Bachelor Degree (Hons) in Financial with multimedia and become the top 15% result of my faculty. 4 years.... I have no idea how I did this but it's all my pass now.I just can't believe that.
I never do well in anything but once I decided to choose my own path or way...I will never let people look down me again. So until now...I never regret for this because I'm happy and enjoying my life after all the hard work I did. From a little girl who trying to look for a private collage but due to financial problem end up I choose to enter my current Uni which provided me a PTPTN loan. But the true side of this was quite stressful as you know MMU is one of the top University you have to work really really hard to get what you want.
To be the independent my parent never give me extra pocket money and I can't live with just RM400 per month. So I work as a part time blogger ,a online shop owner , a photo shooting model and also joined diff kind of event to get some extra pocket money. When I first get into the realistic world I can't breath because people just don't know who am I and when I ask someone to help there are no one. So I rather help myself up. I start from zero until now.
I never got myself any branded stuff except I bought myself a Carlo Rino when I was 20 years old. Within this 4 year I save all my extra pocket money in my bank. If you ask me to buy anything I will need to think twice or maybe more than that. Looking through all my friend's branded bag.. I feel quite envy because I don't even have one. You never know when the first time I went to some event no one talk to me because I look really small and 'cute'. In fact, I'm already more than 20 years old that time.
So my friends came to me and told me that everyone having some expensive branded bag but I don't even have one. Telling me how normal am I. I admit that I'm really NORMAL. I always thought that my cute face will be one of the obstacle since normally people out there will look for a Mature , sexy and pretty kind of blogger. Blogger isn't all about RICH , PRETTY , BRANDED. Not just that. I need to work I need to do and be responsible to my job even it's just a part time one.
As a shop owner my cons will be handling customer's emotion. I'm not good in handling my own emotional but during this 3 years I learned to stay calm even I let my customer scold. Usually it's all about WHY I STILL CANT GET MY PARCEL / I NEED IT TODAY CAN YOU COD?! WHY YOU CAN'T COD? / WHY IT'S FREE SIZE I CAN'T WEAR IT. This is the normal one there are still lots of emotional thing I need to handle ...MANY MANY more..it was hard but I manage to deal with it until now
As a photoshooting model and I did modelling for some shop. Some owner really good when it come to collaboration but some even a little compensation also not willing to pay and try to telling me that my rabbit teeth was super duper ugly and they wasted their time to shoot me. Because of that I QUIT because I don't want to work with anyone who never appreciate my work. You never know I woke up at 4am done my hair and makeup myself then at the same time preparing my assignment + waiting the photographer to fetch me. Outdoor shooting model or modelling took me AT LEAST 8 hours a day. After bank home I need to blogging , prepare and shoot for my new stock + preparation for the next day class.
Sometime I have to skip class to attend event or sometime I'm late so when I need to catch up with all the important thing no one willing to help me because you know...people will always thought you just go event for fun and want to skip class for fun. I never skipped class but once in awhile I might skipped once or twice but still our attendance must be 80% above in order to sit for a final exam.
I'm very talkative and playful in class. I mean I'm really talkative so there are some lecturer or student really dislike me. Maybe 10% out of that 100% really really hate me. I experienced once with my gang of friends. Both of us (girls) looking for people to join our group so when we want to join people's group...They indirectly reject us. WHY? We just behind them.. They like...huh?!! chanwon a..she always like keep talking can she do her job well? if she get into our group maybe will LOWER OUR GRADE!
So all the gossip gossip thing..My friends, Charlotte and I were behind. I'm really sad at that point because we never let others know our result and when people don't know people will judge us with our book's cover. I really wanted to go print up my result and tell them:"HEY...WE ALSO ONE OF THE STUDENT ABOVE CGPA3.5 ONE...KNOW?" Smelly ask me don't bother them. Then me and my friend continue emo during the whole class..
Because we never experience this. Normally we have our own group and no one else should did this to me. I was like.. I'm not good in speaking in a good and formal english BUT I'M SURE I'M SUPER GOOD IN MULTIMEDIA and all the work I do ..I confirm you will satisfied with it..But people never give us the chance to prove it. So end up we continue sitting behind them waiting lecturer to form a group for us.
Since ever we experienced this. Our gang continue to stick with our gang and I slowly never involve in any other group. I just do my own thing and when people trying to prove me I'm stupid i WILL / I WILL FOR SURE PROVE THEM I CAN. So.....end up I proved that because at the same day or graduation... they came to talk with me.
Don't ever blame them because it's a part of our life. Without them...without me! I'm here to thanks my UNI BFF. I'm always the one who talk and who lead them at first but when time getting longer and longer I found that it's very hard for me to perform alone if we can't work in a team. We learned , we cried , we angry and we argue. End up all of us manage to collaborate and work together for such a long time. 4 years and some was 3 years.
It's not really long or either it's not really short but it mean a lot for me. We help each other even sometime when it's almost the due date I always end up scolding and feel like vomit all my blood but we still manage to perform it well. We tried scolded by lecturer and we then improved a lot after each semester. Soon we manage to deal with each other with our own style and I'm not the only leader because I have a best uni friend to help and cheer me up when I'm sad. Thanks babe Charlotte, you know who you are and although I really dislike the way you talk when you really angry but still...4 years :) I love you...still ...and of course within that 3 years of degree another two male that take care us a lot will be Steven and Wen Jian. Thanks you guys!
I have no car and sometime my parent not free to fetch me home. The both male from my gang always appear to help me. I'm too independent so sometime it's really hard for me to take your offer since my dignity can't really change even after so many years...lol lol but still I'm really thankful that within that 3 years each of us manage to scold each other and the next day we can back to usual. You guys still the best although you both really lazy sometime or sometime submit some rubbish thing let Charlotte and I who end up really angry with the work you did but still we manage to deal with it.
It's a little sad that we can't work together anymore in a group but I think that you guys should be happy because never get scolded by both of our group's female. 真的，很謝謝你們。
Apart from that, except my friends...My family came to my convocation. My mom told me at night that she really feel proud of me. You know why if you really know me well you know my relative not really close to me because we are not rich.... But that day..they appear because I'M THE FIRST PERSON WHO GRADUATED from both side of my family. My grandfather got cancer and he still appear even I don't really like them since when I was young they always look down my own family but I swear the time my mom told me that i CAN BE INDEPENDENT..
Imma gonna prove them! Prove them til their eyes drop. So I DID IT. I feel super touch when my mom and dad actually came to my convo. Smelly was the one who help me carry all my thing. My dad first time got me a flower even my mom never receive any flower from him. It might be just a small little thing for you guys but this mean a lot for me. All of them appear on my convocation! I make my own family proud of me and my relative start to talk with my parent and congrats me.
Not sure it was real from their heart but at least I make my mom and dad happy. After 4 years! i DID it.
Other than friends, I'm gonna thanks all of you to be a part of my life. You guys involved a lot in it. Some of you were my customer , buyer and even reader since 6 years ago. Moving forward without all of your love I won't love myself and won't be confident to who am I today. I hate my cute face and you guys were the one who praise me and love me for the real me. I'm not as pretty / as rich / as other blogger or people you know but ... You guys giving me lots of opportunity and support.
Because of all the opportunity I met a lot of good people recently. I met good client and met lots of you in real life. Because of all of the opportunity I got myself extra pocket money to go to diff country and record all my foot steps on my blog. This post gonna be here for my whole life. I'm gonna tell myself my actual feeling on this big day of my life.
All the joys and blast I had were all of the opportunity you and god gave to me. I'm diff because i'm unique and slowly I get used to it. I will continue learn and improve myself to be a better person and bring you some good info on my blog. I don't want any of you experience those bad things I experienced before and this is the main reason why I always share something very random and i THINK it might just help maybe one of you.
Even it's just 1 of you I'm still very happy.
I'm appreciated everyone of you.
Smelly told me that don't ever feel so 'small' for myself. He told me people might have more than 100000 readers but only few of them was true for them. I might not as popular as them or not as pretty as them but at least reader who true to me like you will be really true to me. Not those fake fake behind and talk rubbish about me.
I just want you guys to learn something good from me. Not just always looking for rich people to come across to your life. Make yourself richer than other in term of knowledge and inner beauty. Don't blame your parent or family can't give you a better life because god want you to work harder and get more experience to prove them.
For all the opportunity I had , for all the hard work I did I finally manage to bought myself a car with my own money own savings and no longer have to ask or look at someone's face colour to fetch me. Thanks for all my friends who gave me a ride previously, I will keep and remember everything in my mind.
Now I'm graduated and I can do what I want but I won't give up my blogging life because this is one important part of my life. Because of this I never submit any resume to any bank anymore since the working time really work until midnight. I don't wish to do what I don't like.
I used 1 month to think carefully and got my support from my family telling me that no matter what they won't force me to take any bank job anymore. I can do what I want and here's the reason why I never apply for my next job again. My interested and hobbies not really related to finance but I'm happy I got all my finance knowledge from my lecturer during that 4 years of degree life...
It move to my next point that people start to ask me ;SO HOW YOU GRADUATED? DID YOU GET A JOB? HOW MUCH THEY OFFER? WHAT JOB YOU LOOKING FOR and blablablabla'
Especially some of my relative which I really dislike them when people start to question me act like really concern on me but actually not! At first I was so worried on that but my mom replied them nicely told them I never take any single sens from them so it's my freedom to get any job that i'm interested with. I hope they won't get angry when I answer them like that because IT'S MY LIFE, not yours.
I never take any sens from you so don't be curious on how I can survive without any financial support from anyone. I did everything with my own , every single sens came from my own hand. I do good in my part time and don't be jealous because you got your own life.
So when it come to the end I will never take my blogger job as my full time :) It's always my part time because once it become my full time i will be stress and soon my blog will slowly turn to be more commercial and business minded. Once with that my main income will be only blog so here's the reason I always said blogger will always be my second alternative for my part time. Please understand me this type of question I already answered more than 134329447 times in front all of my curious relative and friends.
Just wanted to tell you that I will always be as independent as previous. Earn my own money and get my own life without depending on someone. SO please stop telling or asking me that is that I still using my parent's money you might just pissed me off with this kind of question. Since 5 months ago i NEVER take any single sen from my parent and I start to earn my money and give 15%-20% of my income to my parent EVERY MONTH.
You know this world is really small. My mom told me that some aunty outside really go and ask my mom's friend for that. If you want to know anything regarding me you can always come on me or ask my mom but it's useless for me to prove to you since you guys will be always jealous of how successfully am I today :) Live your life please
I'm really thankful to everyone of you. My parents , my friends , my readers , buyers , customer , client and my manager for giving me such an opportunity to prove and make them proud of me. I never jealous how people can perform better than me and because of them I can have motivation to perform as good as I can just for myself , my love one and family.
Don't always putting yourself and trying to compare with other this will just make yourself look uglier and getting jealous how people can be better than you. Whether it's good or bad ended up it's all about YOU & YOUR LIFE. No others but ...
For those who still studying now and feel really emo when you study alone , looking for help from someone , or still bullied by others. What I want to tell you is..no one can be there for you for your whole life. You need to learn thing yourself and make yourself have an opportunity to prove them you can. Let your parent prove of you.
Whoever you are , you always have an opportunity just...sometime when you think very negative it won't come out to you. You need to accept for your life and PROVE to yourself so you can always motivate yourself to do something and achieve thing you want. A book will only be interested when the story is interesting. IF you always think YOU CAN'T or you always feel negative , no one will help you. ONLY YOU CAN HELP YOURSELF.
Learn to be independent even it's slightly emo when you did something on your own. You will feel lonely , helpless but this will train you to be a better one. I know some of you came to your UNI alone without friends and without your parent. You cried you sad because of something but believe me..when the day you graduated you will have the same feeling as me :) BEST OF LUCK AND GOOD LUCK for all of you!
If you think you can , You always can! Nothing is impossible until it's done. 熬過去了，當你看回頭 以前的困難也不再是你現在的困難。 我不是幸運的那個 但，我做到了。理所當然的，你也可以！
So it's end for my long post here's some of the photo that I wish to share with all of my true friend and readers like you :) I wanna share my happiness with you...Every part of my life...my story!
I guess I'm totally out of topic (too much of random feeling throwing to me) so here's the photo I took during my convocation and some random shoot after my convocation before I return my robe to MMU! HAHAHAAH Feel so paiseh after talking too much of personal thing on my blog but you know...I'm really so happy that you can be with me throughout the whole process of my life :)
MMU convocation was super HUGE! Even their mmu melacca student also have to come our cyber campus to celebrate and attend for their convo. So the day before that all of us super busy. We have to register and do everything online. We need to print the form fill in of course need to pay for the convo fees -.- RM150 and rent for the robe. A month before that all of us still worried about our system because our system down so we can't update and print all of the important document.
Everything super last mins one -.- Did it 2 days before my convocation. So I got myself a robe and I picked size XS even the website stated that above 155cm should grab S size but luckily I'm able to change it to XS. XS size still very big and loose for me. Each faculty has diff colour of robe mine was YELLOW one! Super chio hor~~ Then playing around with my robe and seriously i hate the hat pn my head.
Keep fall down T.T Luckily on the stage it never fell down. Thanks god!
So this is slightly stupid and childish but still the happiest selfies I ever had. Even selfies with my invitation card. The actual day of my convocation I'm not sure where my parent suppose to be so I ask them wait at a side and I enter hall and thanks god my friend remind me I have to pass them the invitation card if not they're not allow to enter the big hall. Then I run out super duper fast to pass them the invitation card.
Prepare and wearing the robe before enter the hall. Of course everyone using their phone to act as a mirror! AHAHAAHAH
Each invitation card allowed 2 person to enter the hall. Our MMU Hall = SUPER HUGE and super pretty one le! The on stage performance and 3D effect really shocked us! As a mmu student I never thought my uni can be so talent one!
So cool right?
There were some real performance on the upper floor for the music and got student sing. The last time sing our UNI Song was 4 years ago and that day was our last time! Suddenly it become a song that make me feel super touch and feel like crying :'( Not sure my friend who sit beside me can hear or know I tear anot. wtf hopefully not if not I really will feel shame one because no one else tear during the starting of the convocation.
I'm quite shy because I'm the only one who selfies -.- Since the one who sitting right beside me was a stranger. lol
First time feel so satisfied with this kind of thing! Really like fashion show and I feel like I'm wearing the wrong heels -.- wtf totally not match with my robe outfit and my hat keep almost fall down and goyang-goyang there.
This time was the funniest one because the screen will be shooting on your photo for about 3 second then turn to a live show shooting your real face on the screen. They lots of pretty selfies photo on the stage then once it change to the real person face everyone was laughing behind! AHAAAHAHAH Some girl totally use their selfies photo which was super pretty one end up when see the real person on screen was like..OMG haahahah I heard someone said that behind me. It's a male! loll they just looking and checking all the girl!
After 3 hours sit inside the hall finally we can go out and continue selfies! HAAHAHAHAHH Almost fall asleep inside the hall because once it's your turn you will go back your chair and just fall asleep because I woke up at 5am that day -.-
Even better than all my selfies lol
I can't live without bangs so I have to pose like a robot if not I will sweat like hell and the hat will drop -.-
My one and only bro
Smelly so handsome that day. Must be keep waxing his hair and changing the top! ahahaha
Both of them so happy because got a pretty one standing between them! lol They are the first 2 people who talk to me when I just enter MMU. The first time we met til now it's 4 years and the left one was the one who support smelly to chase me 1! HAAHAHAH He's the one who help and joke with us , playing around in the library, making joke of him when he's sleeping on the study table and lots of memories suddenly flashback in my brain.
Nothing much I love other than his bright smile.
He got nothing get my attraction until that time when I see he smile til so bright and joined the talent show with me. Singing on the stage with me and accompany me for the past 4 years..Until now..
He's not a rich bf he can't afford anything branded to me but both of us having each other to fight for our future. I don't believe in forever but at least we trying to appreciate what we had NOW. He spoiled me like a princess and always telling me what to do and what not to. When I sad because of some mean comment on my social media he always appear and brought me a rainbow cake to cheer me up. When I sad he make me laugh and do stupid thing sing stupid song to me when I'm having my female menstrual pain. He can't give me as many as my parents wish since both of us still student but he gave his heart to me , be honest to me and laugh / cry / sad with me.
I can do whatever I want in front of him. Ugly with spec and he's still alright with that but sometime I'm too emotional and independent make him really hard to deal with me! HAHAAHAHAH He know what I want but still...you still can improve la! Give him maybe 78% HAHAHAHAAHAH The rest have to see in the future! lol Thanks his mummy because his mom always cook nice meal and soup for me and smelly was the one delivered it to my house! love you smelly!
Never realise how hot it is unless you wear the robe. Imagine you wearing it and walk to everywhere with this under the super duper hot sun! OMG DAMN HOT. So after 1 hours selfies time with family and friends finally I decided to take if off and go back my house! Really can't tahan the weather! super hot!!! Especially CYBERJAYA!
My eyeliner still haven smudge! Thanks for the cream eyeliner I bought from Laura Mercier RM80! Super nice I bought the brown colour one which i mentioned on my previous post ! Faster get one la really damn nice and useful!
The next day I need to back to my Uni to return my robe and I'm late for one day so have to pay extra RM10 for late return -.- wtf How come I don't even know I WAS LATE on that day. The announcement totally wrong one the stuffs told us that the announcement wasn't clear enough and never feel sorry but we have to pay extra lol Nvm..Last chance for them to collect money from us. lol
So here's some crazy photoshooting under the super hot sun! Thanks Samuel for the help to shoot this! Thanks bro! really thanks for the help!! He's the photographer from https://www.facebook.com/WindQuestPhotography also my senior in MMU. So if you looking someone who shoot for special event feel free to ask for. Thanks god for his help because all my photographer end up never show up but he willing to do this for me even it's just 25 mins but I'm appreciate that!!xx
wtf my expression so ugly leh -.-
HAHAHAH FASHION POSE WITH ROBE LOL
I think i have to stop here! So here's the end of my 'gold fish' expression! Hope you enjoy reading this and GOOD LUCK! Soon will be your turn and I will be proud of everyone of you :) Stay happy and never regret on any of your choice! That's all for today. Love xx.
ps: Pls ignore if i wrote any mistake because when it come to emotional / feeling post I really hate to check and read it back because if I do i won't publish this when i READ it back..So just ignore and I really don't wish to read back all the emotional word later I will tear again! KTHXBYE I LOVE YOU!
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